The Prized Garden of Beaverton Proper
For Phone Reservations, please call (951) 658-5300
Single Admission (everyone) is $20.00 per seat.
Opening Night Admission is $15.00 per seat.
Group Discount available for 10 or more seats.
“One woman’s garden. One town’s scandal. Zero surviving begonias.”
Beulah BumpinPickles has spent years cultivating her crowning achievement: the most dazzling, envy-inducing garden in all of Beaverton Proper. So when the Beaverton Gazette announces they’ll be featuring it in their Sunday spread, Beulah is floating on cloud nine—until she wakes up to a horticultural horror. Her garden has been murdered in the night. Petunias flattened. Clematis trampled. Lawn gnomes decapitated.
Enter Sheriff Hubert Hornbuckle—a man more familiar with pie-eating contests than crime scenes—and a curious stranger who seems to know a little too much. As the town buzzes with gossip, secrets bloom like weeds, and Beulah finds herself wondering: who could betray her in such a vicious, vine-ripping way?
Part mystery, part madcap comedy, My Prized Garden of Beaverton Proper is a delightfully absurd romp about small-town drama, overgrown egos, and the healing power of community… and maybe a little Miracle-Gro. With a bouquet of unforgettable characters and a plot that twists like a garden hose, this play will leave you laughing, guessing, and maybe rethinking that feud with your neighbor.
Types: Full-Length Play
Genre: Comedic Mystery
*** All Ages are Relative ***
Beulah Bumpinpickles (40s–50s)
A warm, no-nonsense Southern woman with a big heart and a green thumb to match. Beulah takes immense pride in her family, her cooking, and her prize-winning garden. She’s the glue that holds everyone together—but don’t mistake her kindness for weakness. She’ll sweet-talk you with a smile while cutting you down with a single sentence if you cross her.
Buford Bumpinpickles (40s–50s)
Beulah’s loyal husband and the town’s resident handyman. Buford has a heart of gold, a laugh that echoes down the holler, and a soft spot for his family—especially Beulah. He’s simple, steady, and strong, but don’t expect him to solve much beyond fixing a leaky faucet.
Tommy Bumpinpickles (20s–30s)
Beulah and Buford’s only son. He’s good-natured and kind, but a little lost in life. Always chasing big dreams, but never quite catching ‘em. He means well and wants to make his folks proud, but he’s still figuring out what kind of man he wants to be.
Thelsie Mae Jenkins (40s–50s)
Beulah’s old high school rival turned neighbor—and the tension never really left. Thelsie married into money and now lives in a fancy house up the road. Always dressed to the nines, always sipping a martini, and always looking for a reason to one-up Beulah. Underneath it all? Maybe just a little lonely.
SnackCake (40s–50s)
The third member of Beulah and Thelsie’s high school trio. SnackCake (her real name’s Charlene, but nobody calls her that) is bubbly, big-hearted, and constantly overwhelmed by her wild kids. She always tries to be the peacemaker but tends to spill secrets she didn’t mean to.
Aunt Blanche (60s)
Beulah’s no-nonsense aunt who raised more than a few people in the town—whether they wanted her to or not. Sharp-tongued, strong-willed, and surprisingly nurturing when it counts. Blanche is the unofficial matriarch of the community, and what she says usually goes. She doesn’t suffer fools, and that includes you.
Colby (20s–30s)
Tommy’s best friend and the newest transplant to the town, Colby is sharp, curious, and not afraid to ask the questions everyone else avoids. She’s observant, kind, and just a bit mysterious. The town hasn’t figured her out yet.
Sheriff Hubert Hornbuckle (40s–50s)
The well-meaning but often bumbling sheriff of the town. He’s got a big heart, a tin star, and very little sense. Folks like him, but they don’t exactly rely on him for real problem-solving. Still, he shows up when it counts—and sometimes, that’s enough.
Delbert Hotchkiss (20s)
A peculiar stranger who wanders into town one day and seems to know more than he should. Delbert is strange, twitchy, and possibly prophetic—or possibly just nuts. Either way, he might be the key to whatever mystery is bubbling just beneath the surface of this quiet little town.
Director – Kristofer James
Showtime & Tickets
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